Another child back to school means a reclaiming of my workspace.

Four down, two to go…but as grateful as I am for the steps toward ‘normality’, a piece of my heart goes with each of them. This year has changed us. All of us.

I didn’t do a Mother’s Day post, because I didn’t know what to say. I’m all too aware of the hurt, of the pressure, of the pretence. Of the smiling mothers who are crying behind the camera, as well as all those crying at the photos. So I didn’t feel authentic to do a ‘blessed’ post, which didn’t convey the volume of emotions I actually felt yesterday. The truth is:

I am grateful.
I feel weary.
I am blessed.
I feel overwhelmed.
I am hopeful.
I feel helpless.
I am in love.
I feel pain.

So I stopped and sat and thought about being made in God’s image-male and female. A mother heart comes from God. So how is God like a mother to me?

He is tender.
He is gentle.
He is protecting.
He is compassionate.
He is the counsellor.
He is the teacher.
He is the healer.
He is the provider.
He is life-bringing.
He knows intimately.
He forgives completely.
He loves unconditionally.
He sacrifices endlessly.

We talk about mum guilt, and isn’t it a real deal? But I find peace when I know, I will never be enough. I love them to the point of pain, but I cannot be everything to them. I would give my life for them, but I cannot stop the world from hurting them.

But I know One who can. And He is enough. And when I come to Him, as His child, He gives His all, and He brings peace.

‘For thus says the LORD: “Behold, I will extend peace to her like a river, and the glory of the nations like an overflowing stream; and you shall nurse, you shall be carried upon her hip, and bounced upon her knees.
As one whom his mother comforts, so I will comfort you.’- Isaiah 66:12-13