Over the last few weeks I’ve been working on the little children getting themselves dressed. Now that Maddie can reach all her clothes and is happy that she can pick anything to wear, she’s keen to try out her skills. Micah is the ever confident youngest child, fiercely independent and reluctant to be babied in any way. So whether or not he has the ability, he’ll always defiantly shout ‘I do it BY MYSELF!’ And with Theo, it all depends on the mood. But he’s been happier to give it a go since I told him a few days ago that he’s four and a half, apparently a grand old age. So this morning, he danced around the bedroom whilst trying to dress, singing ‘I’m four-and-a-haaaa-aaaalf, I can do it because I’m four-and-a-half!’

We started schoolwork by playing a ‘Ladybird whispers’ game-effectively Chinese whispers. It went fairly smoothly to start with-I whispered to Theo, he went to Maddie, Maddie to Toby, Toby to Micah…by the time Micah found Megan, he’d forgotten what to say. So I whispered it to him, he went up to Megan’s ear…and said ‘I don’t know!’. So he was evicted from the game. We tried again, with Theo whispering to Maisie, who looked up, and said, ‘I don’t have my hearing aid in so I have no idea what he said.’

So that went well then.

We opted for making Cheerio worms instead, which had a mildly better success rate, except for the numbers that were eaten prior to making it onto the worm.

Poor Liam was the teacher in demand today. Toby required him for a compass related task. Then whilst I spell-checked Toby’s letter to Boris Johnson before realising it for posting, Liam was busily helping Megan build a marble run for DT which spanned all three floors of the house. Once she had the video footage required, he was then required for his worm charming skills.

Despite all the ground tapping and fork clanging, it turned out that the worms preferred to hang out with Jelly Beans the bunny in his run. That was where they hit worm jackpot.

There was great excitement over putting them in the wormery and feeding them. I feel a little nervous over the possibility of finding escapees sneaking around the house tomorrow morning, especially as Theo has declared them as ‘new pets!’. I’m praying he doesn’t feel the need for cuddles.

Toby has spent the day drawing picture after picture. It’s very nice to see he can still function outside of Minecraft. And we’ve all been given artwork-me, Liam, all the siblings, even the chickens have one above their cage. Plus there’s a few to go in the post. Maybe we’ll add one to Mr Johnson’s letter. I wonder if he’s a Baby Yoda fan or if he’s more keen on Lilo and Stitch?

Around 4pm today things started to unravel. There were soft toys flying past my head, a small child hanging upside down off the sofa, and my lounge was rapidly turning into a scene from a disaster movie.

So I declared a walk. This was not an invitation but an order.

And I’m glad I did. I think we all needed a bit of air and stone-throwing. Although with Micah’s wild and speedy shots coming from all directions, one has to keep paying attention.

I also have to keep paying attention to any new ‘pets’ Maddie might try and and sneak home, now she has a new-found confidence with worm catching.

My head still hurt a bit today, and I still struggled with feeling tense and anxious and like I’m done with all this now. Me and lockdown have about reached the end of a rocky friendship.

But I went out for my Couch to 5K final run of week 4, and the runs are getting a bit longer and I had to think about my breathing and push myself a bit harder, and I remembered. This is a marathon, not a sprint.

We live in a fast-paced world, where I get impatient with slow-running Netflix, and am used to my Amazon Prime next day deliveries. It would be nice to feel like we’d done our 12 weeks of lockdown and clicked our fingers to get back to normal, but it’s not going to be the reality, and I need to find peace with that.

To remember that the waiting isn’t wasted, in the same way as the pacing myself isn’t wasted on a run. I’m absolutely no running expert, but I know that I need to do the warm up walk before I run, that I need to follow the plan if I want to keep going through the weeks. Sometimes it’s the slow bit that is the key to what lies ahead. I often think of the line in this song, ‘He’s in the waiting.’

‘Slow down, take time
Breathe in He said
He’d reveal what’s to come
The thoughts in His mind
Always higher than mine
He’ll reveal all to come

Take courage my heart
Stay steadfast my soul
He’s in the waiting
He’s in the waiting
Hold onto your hope
As your triumph unfolds
He’s never failing
He’s never failing

Sing praise my soul
Find strength in joy
Let His Words lead you on
Do not forget His great faithfulness
He’ll finish all He’s begun.’ (Take Courage, Bethel Music).

There is a plan to all of this, and I’m grateful that there’s gold to be found in lockdown as much as in the future freedom. The last few days have been tough, but I know I’m not alone. And there is strength for tomorrow, because He’s in the waiting.